75. DON’T BE OVERLY TRUSTING - Jack’s Japa Empowerment - Diaspora Handbook - Jack Lookman Limited - Rita Nnamani - Olayinka Carew

75. DON’T BE OVERLY TRUSTING

Relocating overseas exposes you to many new situations and individuals.  It’s natural to be overly trusting, especially when meeting other Nigerians or Africans.  Hearing your native language or seeing a familiar face might bring comfort.  But don’t let shared ethnicity blind you to reality: deceit, treachery, and exploitation may come from anybody, including your “brother” or “sister.”  In reality, some of the worst experiences that immigrants have, come from their own people.  Painful, but true.

You must learn to check, not simply assume.  Just because someone claims to “know the road” or has lived in the UK for years does not imply that they have your best interests at heart. Don’t let anyone collect your documents, charge you for “connection,” or drag you into shady businesses in the name of “helping.” Many people have lost their savings, lost job opportunities, or even lost their status because they trusted too easily. Be friendly, but keep your eyes open. Not everyone who smiles at you is on your side.

Even inside religious and social circles, boundaries are important.  Do not open your life to someone just because they look to be pious or successful.  Keep your private matters private, until trust is developed.  Many people become victims of gossip, manipulation, or even blackmail after oversharing personal information with the wrong persons. 

Over-trust can also have negative consequences in the housing industry.  Do not pay rent or deposits unless you have a formal agreement.  Do not sublet from someone who is unable to provide proper documentation. And never assume that just because they’re Nigerian, they’ll “understand.” This is not Nigeria. Once things go wrong, it becomes a legal matter. Protect yourself with paperwork.

There are good people here, but there are also opportunists waiting to take advantage of your naivety. Move with wisdom, not paranoia. Be discerning, not gullible. And above all, protect your peace, your pocket, and your progress.